By Kent Sayre
Author of Unstoppable Confidence
In this article, you’ll discover how to get whatever you want. I’m going to give you specific principles that, when applied, cause near miraculous results in your life. After you become very clear in what you want, you can go after it in an all-out manner.
For whatever you want, it’s going to come from someone or someplace else. Think about that right now. You want more money? It’s going to come from your company, your customers, your clients, or whomever. You want more love? It’s going to come from your parents, your significant other, your kids, etc. You want more appreciation? It’s going to come from your co-workers, your boss, your significant other, your peers, etc. No matter what you want, it’s going to come from someone or someplace else.
Since whatever you want originates elsewhere, first figure out how to give it first. Here’s one of my top rules:
“You go first!”
If you want love, give it first. Friendship? Give it first. Money? Give it first. There are two principles at work that guarantee that you’ll receive whatever you want back. They are the rules of reciprocity and of equality.
The first rule of reciprocity is why two friends will fight over who “gets” to pay the bill after their mutual lunch together. If all people are dialed into the radio station WIIFM (What’s In It For Me?), then it doesn’t make sense that a person would voluntarily want to pay for lunch. The reason the two friends fight over who pays for lunch is because of a deeper principle at work: the one of reciprocity.
Reciprocity at work is simply the rule “Do not take without giving back. Always give back for what you take.” We’ve had this rule ingrained in us since we were little kids.
Now how can you use reciprocity to get whatever you want? Find someone that you want something from. Then genuinely serve them by giving to them freely. Help them out however they need help.
Let’s say I want to increase my business and I want to partner with Alex who is doing a lot more business than me. I could go to Alex and say, “Hey, would you mind selling my product? It will make you some money.” Alex likely has no interest in promoting my product as a result of WIIFM. Consequently, what I can do is first ask myself, “In what way can I help Alex and increase his business?
I take the answer to that question and go do it. I help Alex out and increase his business. He likes it and I’ve made a favorable impression on him. Now, if I were to pop the question of asking him to help me out promoting my products, he’ll be MUCH more likely. Reciprocity is why. He received and now he’s going to give back.
The second rule of why “going first” to get whatever you want works is equality. To me, the universe balances everything out. If someone consistently gives and gives some more, then they’ll receive. If they give out of their hearts without expectation, the universe goes to work to assure they receive equivalent or greater benefit in the future. I invite you to adopt the belief that you’re a giver and that you’re receiving is a result of your practice of giving.
Another way to get whatever you want is to practice “risk-reversal”. In marketing, this is offering a guarantee on the products so that you can overcome a prospect’s innate aversion to “taking a risk” and buying the product. People don’t want to be burned so they are cautious. With a guarantee, the risk is no longer on the buyer. The guarantee permits the customer to send the product back if the product does not meet their needs. The risk has shifted from the customer to the vendor. The vendor takes all the risk. The customer does not have any.
By reversing this risk, more sales are made and the customer and vendor are both satisfied. How can you apply “risk-reversal” in your life to get whatever you want? Let me demonstrate by the example of Napoleon Hill, author of “Think and Grow Rich”.
Napoleon Hill chose his future employer right out of college although his future employer didn’t know that. Napoleon Hill just decided to work where he wanted. Here’s how he got the job. He went to the employer and essentially said, “Let me work for you for two weeks and I’ll pay you for the opportunity. Let what I pay you be drawn against my future earnings. At the end of two weeks, if you don’t like me, I’ll leave. If you like me, you hire me at the rate I’m paying you for the opportunity to show myself.”
Lo and behold, the employer jumped at this idea. Two weeks later, Napoleon Hill had the job he had set out to get. Why did this work? It worked because Napoleon Hill overcame the employer’s reluctance to hire a new, unproven kid right out of college. View it from the employer’s perspective. He had a risk-free offer. He either got a super employee after two weeks or he got a kid to pay him two weeks of wages and two weeks of FREE labor. For him, it was totally “Risk-FREE”. How can you apply “risk-reversal” in your life to get more of what you want?
Here’s in a nutshell what to do to get whatever you want:
1. You Go First
2. Use Reciprocity
3. Reverse the Risk
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